OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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