K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
