so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
