You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize
