gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
