well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
