so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
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