I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
