Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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