You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
