you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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