i need an iv and a liver transplant
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
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