why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
