You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
