I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
