I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
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