Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
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