I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
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