Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Randomize