we're blogging at a bar
I don't think brook has ever known best
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Randomize
