we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
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