Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Semen is not good for contacts.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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