she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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