Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
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