: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
