So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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