What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Randomize
