have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
