I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
