Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
