So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
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