I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
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