her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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