They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Randomize
