she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Randomize
