dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
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