What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
