real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
