I cockslap morals
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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