but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
