this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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