Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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