the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Randomize
