keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
