I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
