margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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