Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
