I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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