I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
love makes seman taste better
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Randomize
