I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
